Mommy Dearest…

My entire life I knew that there was something askew from the relationship I had with my mother. It didn’t look like those of my childhood friends. The nurturing came with expectations. It was do as I say or suffer extreme consequences. We walked on eggshells. She always kept a level of separation between members of our family. My brother and I are great friends now but we can specifically remember instances where she played us against each other. Sides. It was all about whose side you were on and it sure as hell better be hers. I wasn’t allowed to get too close to anyone; friends or family alike. She would tell me blatant lies and then says she never said them. Her rage when she angered what a force you didn’t want to see so I tried for the most part to appease her. As a teenager I ran away several times trying to escape the abuse. My dad did what he could but she knew how to play him too. He found it was best to coast under the radar instead of making waves. Don’t get me wrong, there are happy memories however they are peppered heavily with what I have come to understand now as an adult is an extreme mental illness known as Narcissistic Personality Disorder. It is difficult to deal with a narcissist when you are a grown, independent, fully functioning adult. The children of narcissists have an especially difficult burden, for they lack the knowledge, power, and resources to deal with their narcissistic parents without becoming their victims.

mommydear

 

I was 30 before I went to counseling myself and thus ran across the blog called The Narcissist’s Child. Looking back I wish so desperately that I could tell 13 year old me what this all means but the truth is that for the most part even 34 year old me still can’t comprehend that someone is capable of all the heinous things my biological mother has said and done and still continues to do. Especially after having children of my own.

 

Your first question might likely be; Is that a diagnosed illness? No, many of those who suffer from this type of illness don’t take responsibility for their actions and even more so, do not believe that they play an active role in the problems they create and because of this they do not, can not and will not seek help. They aren’t broken so there is nothing to fix. Everyone else is the problem. How do I know this to be true? Clinically, I suppose I am not equipped at diagnosing illnesses but you don’t tell someone who has been raped they don’t know what rape is, you don’t tell a child that’s been beaten that they don’t know what abuse is, you don’t tell the hungry they don’t know hunger, so why is it ok to tell the victims of psychological and emotional abuse that their claims are unsubstantiated? That even though they have been abused for decades they don’t know what they’re talking about.

 

Additionally, other family members have seen her history of drug dependency and psychological instability. My uncle, my mother’s brother in-law, is a physician and has also seen these red flag in her behavior himself for many years. He currently possesses the firearms (we will get to that part later) and had told her that she can have them returned if she was to undergo a psychiatric evaluation. She was admitted last May to St. Luke’s Hospital after making multiple threats to cause harm to herself. 

 

I’ll spare you the first 32 years because the amount of time to rehash that just isn’t feasible. So I’ll focus mainly on just this past year. My second son, Mason, was born on January 25th, 2016. He would have celebrated his first birthday this past January. Prior to his birth I met with my mother on multiple occasions both with other family members and alone. Attempts to reconcile our estranged relationship really had no progress despite the multiple meetings. Admittedly, we have both been guilty of not making the relationship work. It is very difficult to trust someone again after a lifetime of emotional abuse and manipulation. Despite attempts it always felt like it was more her doing things to punish or get even with me when things didn’t go her way. She refused to apologize for her hurtful behavior. This behavior in addition to the very ugly, 3+ year divorce with my father has also caused me to keep up my guard and set firm boundaries for my family, especially considering her mental illness. It wasn’t so much that she hadn’t been forgiven, it’s just that what she wanted that to look like and what I felt was healthy for my family were drastically different expectations.

 

Boundaries and my mother will never be in the same sentence. Boundaries do not apply to my mother. In January before my son’s birth she trespassed into my home, uninvited and stood at the foot of my bed and woke me up for no reason. We were not on the type of terms where this was acceptable behavior yet, acceptable behavior and my mother rarely go hand in hand. She was informed that that behavior was inappropriate and not to do it in the future.

5aaf1bd73aba8611a1e61611d5ace479

 

My mother met her 2nd biological grandchild, Mason, once. She sat with him and I for nearly 2 hours after I agreed to meet her for lunch in March of 2016. Instead of wanting or asking to hold him or talk about him, she asked how the real estate market was and what kind of improvements would bring the best return on investments for the home that I grew up in and she eventually “won” in one of the most petty, disgusting divorces I’ve ever seen. A home that she publicly tore apart with photographs on Facebook prior to the divorce so it could appraise for less and she would subsequently be awarded more of my father’s retirement. One would think that she would have shown interest in her meeting her grandchild but it was just another manipulation tactic.

 

She has completely cut out of her life essentially everyone that was closest to her; both of her children, all of her grandchildren, 3 of her 4 siblings (the 4th is in prison,) her best friend of over 25 years, basically anyone that questioned her, showed genuine concern or confronted her for her behavior. And replaced them with anyone that she could convince to believe her pathological lies, including her new family. She found a new man (who bless his heart has no clue what he’s dealing with) and she was granted guardianship of his two grandchildren, who she raises as though they are her kids. She lovingly refers to them as “minions.” During this time she has also left a job of 20+ years and subsequently had multiple other jobs, at least five to my knowledge. She has a history of perjury from filing for marital assistance making false claims that she was unable to work. Proof of employment and physical ability were proven and she was denied maintenance.

 

She told my brother that my 10 year old son was essentially dead to her, informed her Sunday school class that my husband and I are drug addicts who are also in a biker gang and that she, being the saint she is, took care of my oldest son, Max, because we were unfit to do so. Interestingly enough, because I have grown up in church I know people in her Sunday school class that have been more than forthcoming about her delusional memories and stories. But just for the record, we’re not in a motorcycle gang or drunks that can’t take care of our children or any other lies that she’s created in her mind.

 

Three years ago, prior to her being served with divorce papers, she gave my husband, without any conversation involving me, 5 guns. Let me be clear- in this time period I did not touch them, there was not a conversation with me about them, there was no arrangement made with me that we were “safe keeping” them for her. She gave them to my husband in late August/Early September 2013. A fact that her ex-husband can confirm as they were still married at the time and he recalled them being gifted. They were not stolen and in fact, in her recent theft report to KCPD she admitted that she had given/left them “in our care.” This case has since been closed. Detective Paul King found her accusations to be unfounded. In an email from him on December 7th 2016 he states “Per our conversation, the Platte County, Missouri Prosecutor’s Office declined to file criminal charge against (me.) I completed an Unfounded report to (my mother’s) original stealing report to close out this case file.” 

 

It is often her modus operandi to give items as a sign of affection, gratitude or as bribes. Later these “gifts” would be used as leverage or manipulation. (Case in point.) She has sold many of these gifts that were my personal property on Facebook swap shop’s which have an equivalency to Craigslist, but I have not reciprocated with theft reports as I simply wish for her to just cease her harassment.

 

These guns were not listed as assets in the divorce and there was never any conversation with me about these firearms until last May when two and a half years later she suddenly demanded they be given back to her. “Coincidentally” she suddenly remembers we have them and asked for them back after her divorce was finalized claiming them as non-marital items. They are not listed as marital or non-marital property in her divorce, they are not listed as possessions or assets at all. If they are so insignificant and of such little value why is she going to such great lengths to get them back now after all of this time? The reason behind that, to me, is simple; she thrives off of causing pain, manipulation and destruction in order to get or avert attention. She enjoys seeing others suffer. As evident by her lengthy divorce and our current endeavor. I so wish that people could see and know the true person she is, the wolf in sheep’s clothing. It took years for her best friend to see it as well as her sisters and her other biological child but each has come to recognize what she is and how sick she is. And as previously mentioned they have all cut off contact with her.

 

On May 9th 2016 my mother stalked my home, although being previously instructed to not trespass, she was at our home for hours approximately 8 am until 3 or 4 pm beating on doors and windows and “hollering” until neighbors grew concerned and called the police. All the while incessantly text messaging me. I was not home at the time but told the officer to ask her to just leave and declined pressing trespassing charges at the time. I still have a fundamental issue with filing police reports and suing my mother, despite her treatment towards me. It’s evident that she does not share the same convictions.

 

Later that same day she threatened physical harm to herself to multiple sources, which resulted in her being hospitalized. She sent a text message to her sister saying “I just want to die.” “I want all to be over with. If I do die I have a friend that will take care of Bella. That is all that is important.” (Bella is her dog that is approximately 10 years old. She is 60.) Additionally, she posted on Facebook “Let’s see if I can say this right… I am not afraid of the dying part because I know where I am going. I just get sad when there might be someone worth staying for.” Multiple text messages reiterated the same threats. Whether she sent them just to receive attention or because she truly was making plans to harm herself are irrelevant. Multiple family members have careers that require them to be Mandated Reporters. Attempts to contact her after seeing these messages were made. Her daughter-in-law, sent a text message explaining that she was making extremely concerning threats and that she needed to respond immediately. No response was given. Other calls and messages also went unanswered. She possesses multiple biopsychosocial risk factors; mental disorder, use of opioid and other medication (prescribed or otherwise), History of trauma or abuse (she was brutally abused by her father.) Environmental risk factors included job loss (multiple,) divorce from 34+ year marriage, estrangement from family and friends as well as easy access to lethal means.  Due to being required by law to report, we (myself, my husband, my brother and his wife in coordination with both of her sisters) collectively discussed our concerns and found that we were left with little option. We went to the Weatherby Lake Police Department and told them that we were concerned and we wanted to talk to her. In route Det/Sgt. Donnie Hatchman decided that he was going to take authority over the situation and called additional back up as noted in his report. (6) Medics came into the home and she was then taken to St. Luke’s Hospital and we were asked to write and sign affidavits as to our concerns. These were notarized at the hospital. My mother’s boyfriend told us and other family members that he would keep in contact and let us know how she was doing. He did not. Likewise, after her release, my mother did not respond to text messages asking about her wellbeing. I still felt a responsibility to check on her wellbeing. After a large storm went through the area she was living in, I sent a text to her (May 26th) asking, “Are you all safe?” No response was ever sent.

 

I’ve dealt with my mother’s irrational behavior my whole life. It was always walking on eggshells, making sure to do as she wanted… or else. Obviously, being reported was not what she wanted. She acts as though because she gave birth to me that that power trumps all other rights I have as person. She is my mother and even into adulthood I am to obey her. You will notice a pattern in her text messages to me; “YOU, MY child,” YOU always are MY baby even when you do wrong,” “YOU are MY child and I pray for you and your brother every day.” I may be her daughter but I am 34 years old, I am not a baby nor a child. My husband and I have been married for 12 years. It could not even be construed that she has power over me because I live with her or am receiving some sort of care or support from her because I am not and have not. Again, this just furthers my belief that her mental illness is just that. She can not separate or differentiate that although she is biologically a parent she is not in control of me. Even into adulthood her attempts at control came in the form of gifts, guilt, punishment or manipulation. Narcissists are the masters of engineering no win situations. This exact moment is a perfect example. This is lose-lose predicament that forces me to choose between two equally unsatisfactory options. So regardless, she “wins.”

 

And where does it end? Do I have to question whether everything she’s ever given me is now all of a sudden stolen or a non-marital item? This mystery list of “non-marital items” could potentially go on forever, or until a magistrate sees this for what it really is, just another game of hers. She was married to my father for over 30 years. At what point do you draw the line between marital and non-marital items? How do you prove a gift?

 

On June 1st, the single most devastating event of my life happened. Our baby, Mason, passed away from SIDS. He was 4 months and 7 days old. Mason was so much more than a 4 month old baby. He was my oldest son’s best friend. They lit up the room when they were together. Max simply cherished this baby, this little brother that he had waited and wanted for so long. He brought so much life and happiness to this world and in the blink of an eye he fell asleep during his afternoon nap and woke up in Heaven.

13164240_10205158668039995_5327549774339090384_n

 

My mother, with her history of stalking and spies, knew right away and so began the texts; loving, kind messages that seemed sincere. If ever there was a time that we could reconcile surely this would be it. Right away she wanted to be in the mix of it all, I told her she could come to our home on the third day after persistent begging. Looking back I can’t tell if those texts are from the mother I had hoped to have or if they were just her wanting to appear as though she wasn’t this horrible monster. I thought, just maybe, she was genuine but it wasn’t. It was all just an attempt to look as though she was the good mother and grieving grandmother. With her giving in inch immediately means you’ve granted a mile. Another classic narcissistic trait. She was permitted to come to our home once but repeatedly came unannounced and uninvited after that. She brought her boyfriend, who had completely disrespected our entire family and not assisted us when we tried to get her help during her hospitalization.

 

It is easy when dealing with a person of this nature for the roles to be mixed up. The victim is seen to be the aggressor and the aggressor as the victim. Which is all part of the plan. If I tell her she can’t do something, if I file charges, if I call the police all of a sudden I’m the one who has done wrong and she sits back and gets the attention for being mistreated.

609997e60f21504a40fa26a858faeae3

 

I allowed her to go to my son’s baseball game (the one that she previously said was dead to her.) She posted it on facebook, because that’s what you do when you want the world to believe a lie. She continued to come over and take advantage of the inch and then when asked to leave she threw a fit and said she wouldn’t leave unless I came outside. This was June 4th, 3 days after my baby died and I was in bed, a complete wreck, trying to make sense of the devastation of my life. So I had to come out and asked everyone to go just so she wouldn’t cause an even bigger scene. She said she was bullied, that she simply wanted to come inside and pee and that physical violence was threatened against her. It was not. Everything with her is so dramatic.

 

A friend, who also lost a child, was in contact with her and tried to give her things she could do to “help” keep her busy without bothering me. Each project just brought more and more and more things for my plate. In all of this, I will say that she did provide balloons to be released at the cemetery, which was very touching and much appreciated. (I had started writing out thank you cards and had planned to send both her and others but around the time I had intended to send hers I was served.)

 

Seven days after we lost our son our very immediate family was granted a “viewing” before we had him cremated. After our family had come, spent time, grieved and left, I told my husband that I only felt it right to give her the opportunity to see him since she was a biological grandparent. She came right away. She held him, the only time she ever held him. She asked if I would take a picture of her holding him, hesitantly I agreed. She seemed sincere. I thought, “if anything will shake her from this madness, holding her dead grandbaby would.” I was wrong. Within hours, she violated which is probably one of the most intimate, private moments of my life by posting the photo of my baby on facebook. I literally gasped with horror sitting at dinner with my husband and son. I had to leave the table immediately. I messaged her and all I could say was, “NO”, “Why would you put that on facebook??”  What kind of monster does that? What kind of person so desperately needs attention that they’re willing to post a photo, the only photo, of them holding their dead grandson on social media? No, just NO. She also sent this photo out to multiple people via text, including my employer. Yes, she sent MY boss a photo of her holding his dead body.

dead baby

 

The next day my son’s obituary came out. I knew she would be unhappy but tried to lessen the blow as best I could. My mother was listed first, then my dad and then his fiancée, whom he had at one point planned to marry on the day of my son’s funeral. Despite my mother’s feelings, my step-mom is a good woman, a Godly woman, a giving and nurturing woman. SHE has been my children’s grandma. SHE was there when Mason was born, SHE knew him, SHE loved him and SHE has been and is more of a mother to me than my own. I did not choose to include her on my son’s obituary to cause emotional harm to my mother, I chose to include her because she is my family. My mother was a mother when it fit her needs and when she could exploit my son’s death, or anything for that matter, for her benefit.

 

Eight days after my son’s passing, because I listed my step-mom on the obituary, my mother resumed plotting her revenge. In messages she wrote, “The very least that could happen is that Steve’s name is added since he’s at $1,000 to this project.” Yes, she refers to my son’s funeral as a “project” because her “friend” who never met my son donated money on a public Go-Fund-Me page that was set up by my boss. A website that at the time was not something I was keeping tabs on what with planning our “project” and all. 

 

I had met this man once, at the hospital when she was being admitted due to her suicidal messages. Her message went on to say that she was in the process of pressing legal charges against me for falsely having her hospitalized (of which 4 other parties and a police department were part of – not just me) but since she has nothing to lose she can put it back in motion. Keep in mind that we are now eight days since my baby has died and she’s already talking about suing me.

 

All this while my mother publicly gave out my cell phone number (and address) and asked everyone she knew (and didn’t know) to text condolences to me. I don’t want to come off as ungrateful because I know all of those people were genuine but literally within days after my son’s death, while trying to make arrangements with the funeral home, choosing burial plots, talking with our pastor, choosing obituary photos, writing the obituary, picking clothes to cremate my baby in, arranging the pre-cremation viewing… my phone constantly, without ceasing, beeped with messages from complete strangers. Each message I had to stop what I was doing to check if it was a family member, my son’s school, the funeral home, our pastor but it was another well-meaning message from someone saying “You don’t know me but your mom gave me your number…”

 

The day of the funeral went as well as it could. For the most part she was on her best behavior. There was an audience and she showed up dressed for the part. She wore a pillbox hat atop her head and dressed in black from head to toe, despite being told that it was a celebration of life and we wanted people to dress colorfully. She wanted to stand out and she did. She actually told other people she was grieving twice as badly as I because she grieved for both her grandchild and for me. Again, another very common narcissistic trait.

hat 3

 

After my son’s death it was decided as a family that the guns would no longer be kept at my residence in my husband’s gun safe. Regardless of the fact that they were our property, my husband nor myself were in any shape to bear the responsibility of having possession of these guns. After Mason’s funeral on June 11th, the guns were transferred to the possession of my uncle and aunt (my mother’s sister) partly to help alleviate the on-going burden and partly out of general safety concerns. Given our circumstances and all that we had on our plate removing the guns from our possession was decided as the best course of action. Again, without my assistance whatsoever 5 guns were loaded and taken away to their home in South Dakota. There is an affidavit according to such from my uncle who is also a medical physician. 

 

My mother also attempted to file theft charges in South Dakota but the sheriff would not entertain her claims after speaking with Detective King here in Kansas City. Apparently the only county that will actually entertain her false claims is Clay County.

 

On June 22nd, 11 days after my son’s funeral, My mother attempted to coerce me into changing my affidavit. In her message she states that I “MUST go correct you(r) documents that you signed at St. Lukes.” She threatens in that text message that should I not obey she would pursue legal action. I did not falsely write and/or sign an affidavit at St. Luke’s Hospital the night of May 9th and trying to intimidate me into perjury by rescinding my affidavit is illegal. I did not comply with her demands. She notes in her message that she is contacting me against her council’s advice. 

 

From June 3rd until July 18th my mother sent me daily text messages. She began sending me heart emojis, telling me I’m loved, I’m her baby, that she’s my momma and here for me…. All the while drawing out what attention she can from facebook, posting photos of condolence cards she has on display at her “friend’s” house. Every day she sent some seemingly heartfelt message all the while conspiring with her attorney on how to “get even.”

20170608_14083220170608_140920

 

In my mother’s usual tacky, vindictive nature on July 1st, the 1 month anniversary of my son’s passing, she posted and sold on a facebook swap page a mahogany sleigh bed that she purchased as a gift for me my junior year of high school. It had not been moved to my house because when my son stayed with her it was where he slept and it seemed better use there instead of stored in our basement until we could use it. She made no attempt to contact and ask if I wanted it but did make sure to text me that day, “You are my baby and I am your momma. I love you (Heart, heart, heart) I am here for you.” It sold for $175 and also oh so tastefully included the same heart emojis in the ad that she sent to me in her text. This is a perfect example of a “gift” that was clearly stated as such that she took it back essentially and sold. All while rubbing it in my face on social media.

 

On July 13th, when my son had been gone for 43 days, she began her attacks again. Each day is a battle to get out of bed. Each day is a reminder that for the rest of my life my heart will be broken, that our sweet angel is gone but for the sake of our other son, I get up and try to give him some sense of normalcy. Before leaving to run errands around noon we stopped to get the mail, in it was a letter from my mother’s first lawyer (McNabney) dated July 8th.  In it her lawyer states that the firearms that I have never touched nor had prior conversations with her about (except when she demanded that I return them in May), firearms she gave to my husband before her divorce, firearms that are not listed as assets in her divorce decree and firearms that I might add I don’t even have in my possession are to be returned to her within 10 days. Again comes the well known “or else.” In this case her attorney states that “should I fail to answer this demand within the time prescribed we will have no choice but to file an action in replevin in the Circuit Court of Clay County, Missouri to obtain a Court Order to have these items returned.”

 

My mother’s brother-in-law drafted a letter on behalf of the family as a response to the letter sent to me by Jeanne McNabney.  It is dated and was sent on July 14th, the day after I received the original letter from McNabney. My uncle informed my mother’s attorney in that letter that I no longer had these firearms and that I have no interest in them being returned to my possession. Instead of responding to that letter my mother filed a theft report with KCPD which was investigated by Detective Paul King. In her statements to him she admits giving the guns to my husband but that the purpose or intent was not clearly agreed upon at that time. Again, as mentioned above, Detective King found there to be no criminal action and thus concluded that the claims were unsubstantiated. This claim was filed on August 11th 2016, which coincidentally happened to be the same day as my son’s first day of school.

 

On August 29th I received a call from Robin Redmon with Platte County Health and Senior Services. I met with Ms. Redmon on August 31st with my brother. Someone had made a hotline call in which reports of an alleged abuse of a “reported adult” by an “alleged perpetrator.” Allegations of abuse consisted of theft, elder abuse and exploitation. All allegations must be substantiated until proven not to be true or accurate so we were forced to drive to the county court house to meet with this woman. During that visit Ms. Redmon said that I likely would not hear from her again and to this date I have not. It is my understanding that this case has also been closed and deemed unsubstantiated.

 

On the afternoon of Tuesday, September 6th 2016 a man came to our home. My son answered the door and the man asked him if I was home. I came to meet him and he asked me to identify myself. Upon doing so he proceeded to serve me in front of my 10 year old son.

 

After that encounter I went to file for a restraining order. At which time I retained legal counsel and court rescheduled for October 27th. During that time my attorney spoke with my mother’s attorney and the restraining order was dropped at council’s advice as a sign of a good faith gesture in hopes that she too would drop her claim. Clearly it was not.

 

Still, despite all of her behavior, I often find myself surprised at the lengths my mother will go to to get attention or revenge. Last October I learned how pathetic she really is. She contacted a local news station, Channel 5, which offers a “Problem Solvers” segment for the community. Usually it’s used for crooked business people who’ve scammed an elderly person or if a parent has a sick child and needs help, etc…  My mother took it upon herself to try and convince these people that we had done something wrong. She wanted them to do a story about how basically terrible children could abuse the system and have someone’s rights taken away and put into a hospital against their will. Nevermind the fact that she threatened harm to herself via multiple sources, nevermind that some family members are required by law as mandatory reporters, nevermind that a law enforcement agency actually took over and had her committed. The young man, bless his heart, had no idea what he was involved in. I informed him that there was a pending legal case. He asked me to share personal and private records of my mother’s. The documents where she had made her threats as well as affidavits. I told him no, as I found it completely inappropriate to share those details with a stranger. I explained what kind of person he was dealing with. I explained that she was the type of person to post photos of my dead baby of facebook and via text to my friends and boss. I explained that 136 days ago I put my baby in the ground and that despite all of my shortcomings, given our recent personal trauma, a little grace would go a long way and should be granted. I told him that I thought doing the story was a good idea. I told him that I really wanted him to pursue this endeavor because FINALLY people might be able to see the person she really is but I told him I would not assist him in doing such. Later his producer called and said they would not be moving forward with the story.

 

On November 11th, 2016 I went to pick my son up from school and upon walking into the office I noticed a look of panic on his face and he shifted his eyes to his right where my mother was standing just feet away. I immediately went to him and she walked out of the building and sat in her car in the parking lot. The office staff had no idea who she was even though she is listed in their system as someone who could potentially be a threat to his safety. While he was fine, during this time he was in a wheelchair and unable to “walk away” from her. He told me that he was scared and didn’t know what to do. Despite repeatedly being told to not trespass or have any contact as well as being informed by her attorney to have no contact since we graciously dropped the restraining order she still continues to stalk and cross clear boundaries. I believe wholeheartedly because of her mental illness that she is a direct threat to him and our family. My son should not have to fear waiting for the bus or going to school.

 

I have a 3 ring binder. It is now full of documents; texts, photos, screenshots, court documents, etc. I shouldn’t have to have a 3 ring binder separated out by tabs of events so that I can keep it all straight. I shouldn’t have to carry evidence with me everywhere I go so that I can defend myself to whatever stranger crosses my path. I shouldn’t have to live with this woman as my mother and frankly besides blood relation, she is not my mother. She is a monster. I don’t know what I can say or do to show people who she really is. Little by little people just have to see it for themselves.

 

I believe court has been continued 6 or 7 times now. Each time, each continuance, each delay my attorney wants paid. She is drawing this out just like she did with her divorce so that she can cause us extreme financial burden and she has succeeded. Regardless of the outcome, she wins by causing us harm. Not only have we taken off of work each of those times but we have attorney fees and suffering that there is no possible way to put a monetary value on. I do feel that since she is clearly harassing us that she be held responsible for our attorney fees. I dropped the restraining order against her at the urging of her lawyer and mine because her lawyer said that she would try to talk some sense into her and see if she could get the charges dropped. As of last January my mother has continued to be unreasonable and her attorney has removed herself as her legal counsel because of such. My goal is not to get even, not to cause her harm or anything else. I honestly and simply just wish for her to leave my family alone. Just go away. One would think that the amount of suffering we have experienced during the last year would be satisfactory enough for her but it isn’t. I fear that regardless of how the judgement falls that her harassment will never end.

 

On the 1 year anniversary of my son’s death, I spent the afternoon at the cemetery. I had noticed a car driving by several times but was occupied with grieving my baby and trying to clean up around his grave so we could put grass seed down. After several passes she pulled up in front of my car and got out. She asked is she could leave a small balloon for Mason and I told her she could if that’s what she wanted to do. She sat about 4 feet away from me. I’m there to talk to my baby and mourn but she, like always, makes it about her. She even tried to start an argument about the grass seed. After a few minutes of silence she got up and left without a word. She wanted to pick a fight but I chose not to engage because it wasn’t about her that day and I didn’t have enough emotional strength to fight with her, especially there. Seriously, she is not only suing me, stalking me and trying to cause me as much distress as possible, even if that means harassing me at the cemetery.

 

To date we have a trial scheduled on July 21s at 9 am in the Clay County Civil Court under the jurisdiction of Judge Louis Angels. She was able to conjure up a new attorney, Gregg Harrison, after dozens of others refused to represent her.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *